How I Saved My Relationship
By Overcoming 10 Years
Of Erection Anxiety
Hi, my name is Taylor, and I’m writing this as a happily married man. I have a beautiful wife and two wonderful kids. I’m a lucky guy, who is grateful for what he has in life. Because I know how close I came to losing it.
I’m writing this because I’ve learned a lot in the last six months. And I want other men to know these things, to save them the years of pain and anxiety both myself AND my wife endured.
Building The Dream
I was a pretty normal kid growing up. High-school girlfriends, fumbled sex in uncomfortable locations. Nothing out the ordinary. And sure, I may have visited a porn site occasionally. Who didn’t?!
But I was happy with my sex life. My early twenties were great, and then I met my wife. What a moment that was. I wouldn’t swap the memory of that day for all the money in the America.
We spent the next couple of years falling out of bars and into love. A whirlwind marriage followed, and before you say Soccer Mom, we had two darling kids to look after.
So far, so good right? Right.
Just A One Off
The thing is with kids, they take it out of you. When we weren’t caring for the little ones, we were eating, sleeping or very occasionally, drinking. It didn’t leave too much room for sex.
And I was ok with that. Plus, I had my old friend, the porn sites. Which I started visiting again. And again. And again.
Of course, we still had sex – sometimes. But we could go months without. No big deal.
So I remember the first time I couldn’t get an erection. We’d put the kids to bed, we’d fallen asleep on the sofa, and my wife woke me up with suggestion. Why don’t we…
Ten minutes later, we were back on the sofa. “No big deal” she told me. “Just a one off” I smiled back.
Digging The Trench
Now I don’t want to over-dramatize this. On a few occasions, over the next 10 years, we did have sex. Sometimes we even had good sex.
But whether we had great, bad or just non-existent sex – I dreaded the next time. Because I never knew if it was going to end in embarrassment or not.
And it seemed like the more I dreaded it, the more frequent the embarrassments would happen. I was digging a trench and I didn’t know how to stop.
So I started avoiding sex instead. Pretending to fall asleep on the sofa. Telling my wife how tired I was, before we’d even got through dinner.
It made her feel unwanted, and that crushed me. But I couldn’t see any other way. When we did have sex and I couldn’t get hard, she assumed it was because I wasn’t attracted to her anyway.
It was a no-win situation and it went on for years. And years. By the end, my marriage, my family and my life was on the brink.
How was it possible to be so in love, with my wife AND my kids, but for us to feel so alone?
One Day It Changed
I’d turned to Google a few times over the years. It started as casual research. WebMD, Reddit, Men’s Health.
Then it was to find local Doctors to visit.
When they said I was healthy, I tried Viagra. It worked for a few months, but like every drug, the effect soon wore off and I was back to square one.
Of course it had to be my wife who found Lover. She wasn’t even looking! A friend she’d confided in sent her a message one day. Check out this app. And that was the day I started putting my life back together.
I Was Skeptical!
Truth be told, it almost wasn’t the day everything changed though. I was so skeptical! I’d tried it all. The pills, the doctors, even the sea moss! How was an app going to help me?
But Lover had a 3 day free trial. And they said it helped 94% of men with their erections. That their approach created change, for life. No pills. No awkward conversations with Doctors.
And they were even part of the FDA’s program for Safer Technologies.
In the end, I figured – what did I have to lose? I could cancel the trial, and I wouldn’t be any worse off. And the price was a fraction of what it would cost to see a therapist in person.
So I downloaded. I signed up. I watched the first video of Dr. Blair introducing the Getting Hard, Made Easy course. And I almost cried.
She talked about how common erection issues were for men. How she’d helped thousands of men like me, at her Clinic in San Francisco. And how this course distilled those decades of sessions into one course of exercises.
For the first time in years, I felt hope.
I remember doing my first Wax & Wane exercise, and feeling a bit silly. Lying on my bed, waiting for my erection to subside after masturbating, I felt some of that early skepticism return. Could this really solve my issues?
But I stuck with the course. Every couple of days, I’d open up the app and complete the next activity, as instructed. I learned a LOT.
Like how 40% of men my age have erection issues. And how relaxing the mind & body is the foundation of strong and consistent erections.
The course built me back up, step by step. I regained my confidence doing the masturbation exercises solo. And then I slowly brought my partner into the exercises, just as Dr. Blair asks you to.
After 5 weeks, we were ready.
A Brighter Future
It’s been two months since I finished my Lover course now. We have sex a handful of times a week. Whenever life allows.
Am I now a god between the sheets? Perhaps not. But here’s the thing. I look forward to having sex. No anxiety. No dread. No pretend sleeping, or dropping in how tired I am.
You know that period in your mid-twenties? When you’ve figured out how to have good sex, but before life gets too heavy? That is what it feels like now.
The Lover program has given me that magical thing – confidence. I walk in the bedroom and I know we’re going to have fun.
And if something goes wrong? I know I’ve got the tools to deal with it. Even better, my wife does too.
Do I wish I’d done this course years ago? YES. Without a doubt.
But I’m so grateful I found it now. And I hope you do too. Life is too short for anxious sex. So give it a try. What have you got to lose?
Download the Lover app today to start your journey to a healthier, happier sex life.
Designed by Clinical Psychologist and Sexual Therapist, Dr. Britney Blair and her team of experts in San Francisco, Lover is an app designed to improve your sexual pleasure. Approved by the FDA, it's courses are scientifically proven to treat common intimate issues such as Low Desire, Erectile Dysfunction, and Pre-orgasmia.
However, Lover doesn't just treat problems. If you’re looking to improve your skills between the sheets or push your boundaries, its algorithm will tailor its content to your needs.