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Adventures In Sex

If you're interested in more adventurous sex, but not sure how to get started - we’re here to help.

As a Clinical Psychologist, Lover co-founder Dr. Britney Blair is often asked what it takes to ‘spice up’ an intimate relationship. And through working with thousands of couples, she has identified two common characteristics of those couples who manage to achieve it.

The first is a willingness and genuine curiosity for some sexual exploration. And the second is having the courage to lean into what makes you feel anxious. Because sexual exploration means moving outside of your comfort zone. Which can feel daunting to even the most confident of couples. But it is that ability to explore and to move into the unknown, that can do wonders for your sex life!

But, before we dive in, keep in mind that all sexy adventures should be safe, legal and consensual.

Start With Good Communication

If you want to bring passion back into a relationship and experience more adventurous sex, it’s absolutely imperative that you start by working on your sexual communication skills.

Because if you're going to venture outside of your comfort zones together and embrace the new and the novel - communicating before, during and after these sexual experiences is going to be of critical importance.

Remember that while novelty and nerves can be a healthy feeling when you're exploring your sexuality, keeping consent absolutely explicit is non-negotiable. This means that you need to be comfortable navigating a conversation about pushing your comfort zones, without coercing your partner into doing something they don't want to do.

And this goes for you too of course! So agree on some ground-rules upfront. If one of you isn't enjoying themselves, they have permission to say so using direct language. There is no room for vagueness when it comes to consent. Be direct and honest - and even better, set up a safe word, and use it. Ideally, this is a word that wouldn’t come up in the throes of sexual arousal, like ‘Chicago’ or ‘orange’.